Origin Story of Mom’s Screaming


Hi all. I am every mom’s screaming. I am the common denominator of all moms unless some mom is too rich with lots of helps. General idea is that moms scream a lot without any rhyme and reason. However there’s an elaborate origin story always. To understand it better let me give you my origin story for this mom with three kids A, B and C.

Mom is sitting quietly and trying to update her status in Facebook. C is sitting on floor. Suddenly A and B barged into the room.

A: Mom B has taken away my orange crayon.

B: No I have not!

(C can’t yet speak and is now trying to touch a shoe)

Mom (in her mind): Control Lady! Ugh who cares about a crayon and it hardly matters if a kid touches a shoe. I can be calm. I can be without anxiety.

A: Mom I need the orange crayon for my Sun.

B: I have never even seen the orange crayon.

(C is not merely touching the shoe, he is holding it now)

Mom (in her mind): Oh what was it I was thinking about…..status…….what Sun? And shoes……holding……no not that bad. I will let go of these small small things…..let it go…..let it go….lalalala….

A: I have to finish the colouring right now!

B: I hate you!

(C is now rubbing the shoe all over his body)

Mom (in her mind): hmmmm…..status……staus…….what? Finish the colouring now? Is she kidding now? She is always as slow as an ant….or is it caterpillar? Oh why can’t I remember anything? Not even a common expression! Oh I am getting old! Oh old……wrinkly….no achievement. All bad. And how bad is rubbing shoe on body? Calm down lady! It’s not that bad. Some says it increases the immunity. Not some actually, it’s only my mother in law. Generally I never listen to her but this one time I think her idea is total gold. Or it just serves my purpose so…. I am such an evil person. I should go and call her up right now.

A: Mommmmmmmm……. my tutor comes in five and I can’t finish the colouring assignment now because no orange crayon. B you give it to me NOW!

B: You give me my mermaid sharpner first.

A: I don’t have it.

B: mey mey mey…. I don’t have it.

Mom (in her mind): What…..assignment…….how  come I didn’t know about it? A has not finished it. Now what will the tutor think? I am a bad mother that he will think for sure. That’s of course is not true. No seriously, am I a bad mother? Maybe….I am losing control….kids are not being responsible….and lying….and I am sitting here happily without anxiety for whole five minutes…..I haven’t even started cooking….and plumber didn’t come even after I called him up twice…..

(C is now chewing the shoe)

Mom (in her mind): Oh gosh I am a bad mother and he is chewing it now. And I have lost it…..

(So this is my origin story. You all can only imagine the decibel mom went to after this. It was a no hold barred full on scream meant for A, B, C and the whole world. The neighbour of course thought for a minute there had been a nuke attack)

Mom’s scream got over after full five minutes. I went away. The kids got busy with their usual banalities and mom got back to update her status in a rush before the feeding time of C.

“Feeling blessed with A, B and C”

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